Day 20: Struggles

This is another first for me. (admitting my faults, flaws and addictions publicly) I am struggling with smoking. I know, nasty habit. Giving up alcohol? No problem! But smoking? You wouldn’t even believe how addicting these little things are.

So I’m in the middle of quitting. Where, technically, the “middle” is, I’m not sure. But I’m somewhere between the last cigarette and being done quitting? Yea…



1) Every eight seconds, a human life is lost to tobacco use somewhere in the world.  That translates to approximately 5 million deaths annually.

2) Ambergris, otherwise known as whale vomit is one of the hundreds of possible additives used in manufactured cigarettes.

3) There is enough nicotine in four or five cigarettes to kill an average adult if ingested whole. Most smokers take in only one or two milligrams of nicotine per cigarette however, with the remainder being burned off.

4) Half of all long-term smokers will die a tobacco-related death.

5) Every eight seconds, a human life is lost to tobacco use somewhere in the world.  That translates to approximately 5 million deaths annually.

6) Secondhand smoke contains more than 50 cancer-causing chemical compounds, 11 of which are known to be group 1 carcinogens.

7) While they may look like white cotton, cigarette filters are made of very thin fibers of a plastic called cellulose acetate.  A cigarette filter can take between 18 months and 10 years to decompose.

8) Benzene is a known cause of acute myeloid leukemia, and cigarette smoke is a major source of benzene exposure. Among U.S. smokers, 90 percent of benzene exposures come from cigarettes.

9) There are 1.1 billion smokers in the world today, and if current trends continue, that number is expected to increase to 1.6 billion by the year 2025.

10) Kids are still picking up smoking at the alarming rate of 3,000 a day in the U.S., and 80,000 to 100,000 a day worldwide.


I have heard many times that nicotine is one of the most addictive drugs…ever! And I can attest to this. I have tried to quit smoking several times, and in the immediate day(s) following giving up smoking cold turkey, I don’t even recognize who I am anymore. I am cranky, the tiniest thing will set me off, nothing can make me happy! I want to eat all of the time which makes me mad cause I’ve just lost all of this weight and THAT isn’t going to help anything.

Luckily, I have a wonderful husband who is not a smoker and very supportive of what I am trying to do. Right now I am [looks at clock and does math impossibly slow] about 70 hours in. I’d say the worst is over, but my favorite place to smoke was always when I was driving. So the biggest test will be here in just a few short hours. Not looking forward to that…


When talking to my husband about it yesterday, he asked me why I wanted to quit. Whether it was for me or for him. This matters quite a bit. It took me wanting to quit drinking for myself before I even made the first attempt. The main reason I want to quit smoking is for me. I want to be healthy and, quite frankly, attractive. As superficial as that might seem, its the truth. I don’t want the wrinkles and dry skin. I also don’t want lung cancer or heart disease. I have plans! Can’t see them through if I’m dead.


4 responses to “Day 20: Struggles

  1. Hang in there chic! You can do it!! I can’t even stop drinking caffeine, so I can’t imagine other things… Stay strong!! :-) Wanna run Color Vibe with us in July!!?! It’s a healthy thing to do that might keep you motivated??!?!

    I’ve seen the side effects of smoking in various family members and it sucked, SO if you are ever freaking out and need to “be cranky” just write or call! I have NO idea what you are going through, but would LOVE to see you succeed!!!

    • See, caffeine I just can’t give up. I’ve had caffeine withdrawals before and it is painful. Talk about a headache. Thank you so much for your encouragement! You’re a sweetheart! And definitely let me know about the 5k :)

  2. It’s strange that people smoke even when they know all of the adverse affects of it. In fact, I guess every smoker knows it’s dangerous for the health. So why smoke? I am not judging anyone. I am already an addict – to coffee
    AND I am thinking I need to see what a cigarette is all about.
    In my over 30 years of living, i have never ever tried it. Maybe it’s time I did – just the sake of having that experience. Cannot get addicted with just one – right?

    • It really doesn’t make any sense. I know it is terrible, but I did it anyways. I wouldn’t suggest trying it. What if you like it?! That would be one more thing to be addicted to. DON’T DO IT!

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